Learning More About My Process

I have not been able to get started on my BJP piece. I am learning to pay attention to what seems to stop my flow of creative energy, and what keeps it going. In the past, I've just tried to force myself to complete projects. Now I want to experience more flow.


Here is a part of my journal showing the images I have been playing around with for BJP. I watched youtube videos of polar bears, and read several articles on the net about polar bears and about the spiritual qualities of polar bear energy. Fierceness, strength, navigating magnetic lines, introspection, overcoming fears, navigating emotional waters. Powerful qualities.





I made this sketch, then realized that I don't want to work this way, filling in an image with beads. I've lost all energy for this type of beading. And most of my seed beads are in storage anyway. So I thought I could work with just the concept of polar bear and see what I'd create, but guess what? I could not make myself get started!





I am resisting even having an idea in mind. I began to panic, thinking I wouldn't be able to participate because I haven't been able to get started. Then tonight, I went downstairs and made this fabric piece. It's green cotton stitched with white silk thread. I ran it through the washer so the edges would fray.
I wonder what will happen next??